Labels

I don’t understand how you can click with someone and as soon as you label things, everything changes. People contradict themselves. People lie. People change completely. Why? Fear of commitment? Fear of getting hurt? Fear of not being accepted? Lack of experience? The truth is, it is all of the above. And that is exactly what I can’t seem to fathom. Why is it that as soon as we label things, everything changes? I mean when you are dating or just friends, everything is dandy. You are yourself, you open up to each other. Hints of jealousy? Maybe here and there. Fights? Nothing extreme. If anything, those fights before labeling anything are when each person is actually open and honest about how they feel without the famous power struggle or something else getting in the way of solving the problem. So why? Why when you label things does the label seem to suffocate the relationship? Whether we are labeling each other as friends with benefits or as boyfriend and girlfriend, gf and gf, bf & bf, etc. something always seems to change. Don’t get me wrong, not ALL relationships change completely, but look back and think. When you and your partner first dated, was it different than how it is now or when you made it official? It just doesn’t make sense to me. And I guess that is just one of life’s many complications. It isn’t a bad thing, it just seems to be the norm and that is what I dislike. It is something I would love to change about my future relationships. I personally just don’t believe in labels unless it is the real thing: Marriage. Because to me that is the official commitment. Even though it is in essence just legal documents, that is when you truly commit your heart to someone, and when I do that, I want to make sure that I remain myself because who wants someone to fall in love with their idea of you and not the real you? So my readers… what do you think? What is your take on labels?

~An Ordinary

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